December 20th

31 Days of Jesus - Day 20: Exercise!

I feel close to God when I work out. I almost feel like it doesn't make sense, and that maybe, it shouldn't be included as a part of this 31 Days of Jesus journey. But, this is where I am today. And so far, through this whole thing, it's been incredibly fruitful for me to use the stuff that makes up my day and my overall morale to write this blog.

I'm done with school. I've been cleaning our horribly messy room for most of the day and watching the Biggest Loser Thanksgiving Edition as a way to get motivated to begin the process of getting back in shape. Jermaine and I trudged outside with our neighbor's shovel and were successful in digging our car out of the snow. Right before we ate, I squeezed in a powerful 10 minute workout and I'm aiming to get myself back out to our apartment gym in a couple of hours [after my belly has settled from dinner].

Oh, and also, randomly, I just finished watching some sort of Olympic skiing competition. And it got me thinking . . . I want to go snowboarding!

And so, I think I'm going to try to make it a reward for myself. If I can stick to an exercise routine for 6 weeks in a row then, on February 5th [tentatively], I'll head up to the mountains.

One of my major problems is that I tend to "reward" myself with food. Bad day? Have a candy bar. Big test? Buy some cheesecake. Gluttony, shame, low-self esteem, perpetuating bad habits; they're all interconnected and keep me messed up. I keep thinking that I need to figure it all out [ie: why I'm doing this to my body] before I can begin to fix the problems. But I'm learning that maybe I need to begin the *work* of fixing the problem before I get it all figured out.

ALSO - I don't want to do this alone. I realized that's why I keep blogging about my weight [http://outofshapeaerobicsinstructor.blogspot.com]. I'm hopelessly social and it's my own unique way of reaching out [even though I'm embarrassed] because I know I'm not alone in how I feel. There are thousands of people out there who struggle with weight and self esteem issues [regardless of the number on the scale].

Maybe today [or tonight, rather], we can prayerfully exercise, asking God how he wants us to use our bodies to glorify him.

Oh! And PS. I don't want to go snowboarding alone, either. My friend Jess and I are tentatively planning a trip this year - if you want to join us, let me know! We'll figure out a weekend that works well for all of us [the more the merrier!].

Love!